Don’t have kids if…
1. You like sleep
2. You don’t like being woken up with a smack in the face or a kick in the back
3. You want to eat a whole chocolate bar to yourself
4. You like peace and quiet
5. You like having lazy days
6. You like having daytime naps
7. You like wearing clean clothes
8. You like to go to the bathroom alone
9. You like having money
10. You like spending your money on yourself and no-one else
11. Like a clean, tidy house
12. You don’t like crayon on your walls
13. You don’t like play dough mushed into your carpet
14. The sound of a screaming or crying child drives you crazy
15. You can’t think of 100 ways to keep them entertained on a rainy day
16. You don’t want to spend at least two hours pretending to be a doctor and nursing a baby doll back to health
17. You don’t like dealing with other peoples bodily fluid
18. You like to eat out without spending 85% of the time going back and forth to the toilet
19. You like to walk without having a child or two hanging from your legs and/or standing on your feet
20. You’re easily embarrassed – a potty in a public place, a tantrum in the supermarket or your child announcing to the whole church that they’ve just ‘fluffed’
Tune in tomorrow for ‘Have kids if…’!
1 Comments
Martyn – Being Free
January 28, 2015 at 7:35 pm
This is the best list ever!!! Very funny and very true!